God Watching: Seeing Kevin, Visiting Dad, And Driving 1300 Miles In A Busted Car

Christine's picture shows God was watching over us

Oh, it just feels so good to be home! This past week has been filled with all sorts of emotional ups and downs, but I am glad I was able to be away to be with my family. Thanks for indulging me in my longest absence from the blog since I started it. As you know, we drove 450 miles down to Pensacola, Florida to see my brother Kevin and most of the family I grew up with last Tuesday.

Our original plan was to stay until Tuesday this week, but a telephone call from my stepmother Faye last Thursday changed our plans. That day we learned my father was going to be going in for quintuple heart bypass surgery this week. So we took a detour on Sunday north to Bolivar, Tennessee before coming back home to Spartanburg, South Carolina on Tuesday night. It was quite a memorable week of events.



We had an awesome time seeing my brother Kevin who has been told he only has a few more months to live. In 1999, he suffered a series of heart attacks that basically killed 85% of his heart function. The doctors cut out the majority of his "dead" heart a few years back and he only has one artery functioning now. That artery is 95% blocked and stents don't do any good anymore. He's too high-risk for any surgery and he's pretty much given up on changing his diet at this point.



The thing that struck me about seeing Kevin was how "normal" he looks right now. Yes, he's a very large man weighing about 350 pounds. But he's out and about doing the things he loves the most--playing Texas Hold 'Em, bingo, flirting with the ladies, and singing at the local karaoke bar. We did a little bit of all of that together last week (sans the flirting for me since I already have my woman!). And yet he's on morphine and oxygen for comfort because he's easily out of breath and starts sweating profusely even in a well air-conditioned room. This is Kevin's life right now.



Despite my little "accident" earlier this year on the cruise to Mexico singing karaoke, I ventured back on the stage again to sing "You Are So Beautiful" and Roy Orbison's "You Got It" to my lovely bride Christine while Kevin sang some country music songs that I'd never heard of. It was a lot of fun, although not something I'm accustomed to doing around midnight on a Friday night. :) But I wanted to be there with and for Kevin. We made some great memories together.



We stayed with my beautiful sister Beverly for the week who was a very gracious host making us homemade meals, driving us around everywhere we wanted to go, and just being a good little sister. In fact, Kevin came and stayed with Beverly too during the week. Since we all grew up together as kids, it was pretty neat all being under the same roof again as family. That has been a rarity since we all became adults.



When we went over to mom's house for dinner to watch some Jeff Dunham DVDs together (HILARIOUS if you have never seen this funny ventriloquist--he's the "on a stick" comedian with Walter, Peanut, etc.--Kevin was laughing so hard I was worried about him, but it was great seeing him enjoying himself so much), I took a photo of a picture when all of us kids were young. Beverly was about 3, I was 5, and Kevin was 9 or so in this photo. Don't you just love looking at how dorky you are when you were a kid (no Christine, I don't STILL look dorky today!).



My mom and stepdad Frank surprised me while I was there--they said they started livin' la vida low-carb to lose about 50 pounds each. As you know from my podcast interview with my mom last Fall, mom has struggled keeping her weight off despite having gastric bypass surgery in December 2003. I was so tickled to hear how enthusiastic Frank was about the low-carb lifestyle and his eagerness to be doing it for his weight and health (he cited that study that came out last week because he saw it on the news touting low-carb over low-fat--ummm, I haven't heard of it! LOL!). And they've even got Beverly to join them on this. I suppose this situation with Kevin has caused them to get serious this time around. Here's hoping.



It was hard to say goodbye to my family in Florida on Sunday, but I had to be there for my dad and his surgery on Tuesday. We hit the road early that day to be in Bolivar, Tennessee before dark and met up with my half-brother Nathan, his wife Stephanie, and their new son Hunter. As you know, Nathan (or Nat as we called him growing up) was one of my inspirations for starting low-carb since he was so successful on it. Interestingly, he's not doing it now, but he knows it works for him when he does it. It was awesome seeing their new baby. I WANT ONE! :)



We also had a delightful visit with my Aunt Mary Jane while we were there. She told me about how much she enjoys reading my blog (HEY MARY JANE!) and feels like she's been talking with her nephew when she reads it. In fact, my computer illiterate dad finds out more about me through Aunt Mary Jane from the stuff she reads here at my blog and tells him about. That freaks out my old man out when she tells him some of the things I'm up to. He is so 19th Century!



Of course, the reason we went there was to see my dad in support of his heart surgery early on Tuesday morning. We had hoped to spend most of the day Monday with him, but my dear old dad had other plans to "tie up loose ends" and working all day. He has the kind of job where he is a Jack-of-all-trades (or a J.D.-of-all-trades as I call him--J.D. is his name!). And he was up bright and early at 6:00am Monday morning and worked until nearly 9:00pm the day before having his open heart surgery. That's my dad for ya.



We were up obscenely early on Tuesday morning--like 3:00am to get packed up, hit the road up to Jackson, Tennessee, and be there with dad before his surgery. On the way to the hospital, my check engine light started going crazy on me. I noticed when I pressed the gas the engine would struggle. Uh-oh, not NOW! More about that in a moment! Needless to say, we prayed without ceasing for that little Escort to keep going.



Imagine my surprise when less than an hour before he was going in to have his chest cut open here comes about 20 people to be there with my dad to pray and support him during the surgery. In addition to me, Christine, Nathan, and Faye, there was dad's older sister Mary Jane, dad's brother Paul, dad's younger sister Gaylon, and I do believe the entire Sunday School class from dad's church in Middleton, Tennessee as well as the pastor. What a blessing it must have been for dad to see all these people fawning over and sacrificing their time early in the morning just for him. He's not used to this kind of attention. But I know he appreciated it more than he'd ever admit.



That sunset from my dad's front porch is all he is gonna be working on for the next few months as he recovers and heals from the surgery. I had no idea they actually had to break his chest bone to get inside his heart. OUCH! That's gonna be the hardest part whenever dad will want to cough or sneeze (which he is prone to do with his allergies). Don't you know he'll be squeezing a pillow with him a lot? The really GREAT NEWS is he got through the surgery and is now up and alert with no complications. Praise God! THANK YOU so much for your prayers and happy thoughts.



Now, about our car. Our beat-up and nearly broken down 1998 white Ford Escort was literally on its last leg although we didn't know how close it was to dying on us as we traveled through the mountains of Nashville and Knoxville, Tennessee on Tuesday--but we kept praying for God to just get us home. After driving 1300 miles in the span of a week to be with family in their time of need, we NEEDED that miracle to happen for us...and it did. The car ran perfectly until I went to the post office on Wednesday morning and that was all she wrote.

When the car started shaking violently and making a loud rickity-rackity noise, I knew it wasn't good. Turns out my timing belt broke and the valves were all shot to you know where. The expense to repair would have been about as much for another vehicle, so we decided to get a new car for us. That car in the picture above is our new 2002 Buick LeSabre with less than 50,000 miles on it--and it cost us less than $10,000. WOO HOO! I couldn't have been happier with that deal. We'll be making payments on it, but at least it's a car we can rely on as we travel around to various places with our business.

I am beyond tired right now and need to get some rest. But I will be back to full-time blogging again starting on Thursday and for the next few weeks until my trip to Nashville, Tennessee in mid-August for former "Biggest Loser" contestant Isabeau Miller's FitCamp where I'll be joining other "Livin' La Vida Low-Carb" blog readers and people wanting to get into shape on a two-week journey to whip themselves into shape. I can't wait to provide daily video updates of this experience for you.

Plus, while we're in Nashville, I'd like to have a get-together meetup with the low-carbers in that area, so let me know if you're interested in coming. I don't have a specific date or time yet, but we're staying in the Franklin, Tennessee area on Murfreesboro Road. Drop me an e-mail if you think you can possibly come in late August at livinlowcarbman@charter.net. Let me again say THANK YOU to everyone who has prayed and thought about us this past week and a half. It really means the world to me that so many people care and love us like family. I gotta tell you I've missed blogging, though, so I'll be back at it hot and heavy in very short order. SEE YA!

My Dad Is Having Emergency Quintuple Heart Bypass Surgery Next Week

Hey everybody! Yes, Christine and I are still in Florida having a GREAT visit with my brother Kevin, sister Beverly and our mom this week on our vacation. We've had a good time together so far spending quality fun time with each other (mostly playing Texas Hold 'Em and we're planning going out for karaoke on Friday night) and I'm so glad we've been able to do this. Kevin looks and sounds great right now (although it's probably the morphine the hospice nurse has stocked him up on!), so it's like nothing is wrong with him. But we know his time could be coming up soon.

THANK YOU to everyone who has prayed for us during this time. Beverly said Kevin is down to just one functioning artery and when it becomes completely clogged, well...you know the rest. While our hearts and emotions about this are heavy, it's good to know we are able to be with Kevin in a joyful way during these potentially final days of his life. He's still the same ole big lug brother I grew up with and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I wasn't planning on being online much or at all during my visit to Florida this week, but I just got a telephone call from my stepmother Faye in Tennessee who said my dad is going in for an emergency QUINTUPLE heart bypass surgery next Tuesday. The doctor recently did a heart cath and said three of his arteries are over 90% blocked and the fourth one is 80% blocked. It's not a good situation at all, but they seem to think they can help him. He's had a couple of heart attacks before, so this isn't completely unprecedented. On top of what's happening Kevin, this is a bit much to take right now.

We're deciding whether we are gonna make that trip up to Tennessee and when because we want to be there for him. Our original plan was to drive back home to Spartanburg, South Carolina on Tuesday and we'll probably just go straight to Bolivar, Tennessee from Florida--likely on Sunday. His surgery will be taking place in Jackson, so we may just meet the family there on the day of the surgery on Tuesday. He's expected to be in ICU for several days although he told my stepmom he'd be out in a regular room the next day (YEAH RIGHT--that's my dad!).

I don't know how it's gonna happen with all that's going on right now, but I want to be there for my dad through this. He's only 59 years old which is too young to be dealing with this. But it's a solemn reminder that we just never know when our health is gonna kick us in the tail. Dad and Kevin have both made choices to be in the position they are in right now, but that doesn't make what they are going through any easier to deal with.

Right now, it's unfathomable to think about the worst case scenario of losing both my brother and my dad this year. But I'm hoping for the best in both situations right now and I know that God holds both of these men in my life in His Hands to do as He wills for them. Whatever that is, I'm just thankful for the opportunity to call J.D. my dad and Kevin my brother. They are two remarkable people that I had the privilege of growing up with and loving during my life.

THANKS so much for your prayers for Kevin and my father.

Oh, by the way, I am aware of this July 17, 2008 issue of New England Journal of Medicine with that study that is ALL OVER THE MEDIA right now and I was even interviewed and quoted in this Wall Street Journal column in today's paper. This was awesome POSITIVE coverage for livin' la vida low-carb (although Dr. Dean Ornish got in his digs despite his assertion that we all agree on diet)--I think they purposely planned to release it knowing I was gonna be gone. Just kidding! :)

I'll update again when I get a chance...I appreciate your support!

Surprising Kevin Perhaps For The Last Time

I hope this isn't the last picture taken with my brother Kevin

When it comes to going on vacation, I'm the kind of person who would much rather stay home and just take in the sights and sounds of life in my area that are normally overlooked in the day-to-day living to simply relax and enjoy myself. Loading up the car with a bunch of luggage, driving umpteen hundred miles to get to your destination, and then trying to cram in activity after activity to entertain yourself is not my idea of the perfect vacation. Don't you need a vacation from your vacation when you get back?!

But one thing trumps all of that when it comes to going on vacation: seeing your family! My wife Christine has family north of us and my family is split between west and south of our home in South Carolina. We try to make the rounds every year or so and it had been a couple of years since we went to visit my mother. stepdad, brother and sister who all live in the same town. So we decided to travel down I-85 (through some horrendous traffic there and back going through Atlanta!) to see my family over the Thanksgiving weekend.


Here's my family sitting around the table after the Thanksgiving meal

My sister Beverly was so gracious to open her home up for Thanksgiving when she heard we were coming and that we wanted to surprise Kevin. My mom had planned on going out to eat with my stepdad, Beverly and Kevin for turkey day, but my dear sister wanted it to be more special than that with us driving down to visit. She did an excellent job with the meal!


That's my pretty little sister Beverly who is two years younger than me

Mom cooked the turkey and brough ham and Beverly did the rest. They allowed me to cook up a batch of my mashed cauliflower and low-carb stuffing, although my mom and stepdad weren't very thrilled with either. Oh well, it wasn't for them to eat now, was it? :D

I didn't eat any of the desserts that were prepared because they were loaded with sugar and flour. But everyone made sure to tell me how mmm mmm good the chocolate pie and apple pie was. Not for me because I'm livin' la vida low-carb and those are just RAT POISON! LOL!


From left to right, my mom, my wife Christine, and my brother Kevin

We didn't have a whole lot of time together over the weekend because he had some odd and end things to do, but I was able to see my brother Kevin a little. As many of you know, he has had quite a year since being told by a doctor to lose weight or die. Despite this grim warning, Kevin has not lost a lot of weight yet and his health has paid the price.

I was very tempted to tell Kevin what he needed to do to shed those pounds and get his health in order. However, more than anything else, I just wanted him to know he was being thought about, prayed for, and wished well by countless numbers of people (mostly YOU!) who really do care about him and want to see him well. He wanted me to let you know he appreciates your concern and that he is going to try to do something about his situation. We can hope and continue to pray at this point.


Kevin's a big man who has had one doozy of a life so far

One thing that shocked me was when we sat down to watch a movie together as a family on Saturday night was when mom made a big batch of brownies. The aroma in the air was just too much for Kevin to bear, so he went and loaded up his plate with 4 large blocks of brownies with ice cream on top. Keep in mind he's a Type 2 diabetic and morbidly obese! Oh, you don't know how much I wanted to scream, "NOOOOOOO!!! YOU DON'T NEED THAT, KEVIN!!!" But I bit my lip and remained silent.


My beautiful Christine with my brother Kevin

I learned a long time ago that you can't force someone to change who isn't ready to change. They have to be ready and it's our job to serve as an example until they are. That's all I have left to hope for at this point. Kevin is a 39-year old man who doesn't need someone to hold his hand about what to do with his life. He alone makes the decisions about his life and he will have to face the consequences of his actions at some point. Hopefully he'll have a "later" to get to it.

It was so good to see my skinny momma looking so good following her gastric bypass surgery three years ago. But the woman eats worse than a bird does nibbling on about three or four bites of food and then stopping. Amazing! Yet she looks absolutely fantastic and I'm so proud of her.

My stepdad pulled out his glucose meter on Saturday to check his blood sugar and wanted to see what reading everyone else had. My mom was in the 160s, my wife Christine was in the 120s, and Kevin refused to have his checked (maybe 300+ after that brownie bonanza?!). So he came to me and his jaw dropped to the floor when he saw my reading was 86.

He asked me if I was feeling okay and I said I felt perfectly fine. He said that my blood sugar was a little on the low-side. I told him that's pretty normal for someone who is controlling his carb intake to manage his weight and health. Let's just say it left an indelible impression on him that may have him counting carbs and watching his sugar. THAT is the power of being an example for others to follow.

Overall, the time away was amazing except for the fact that I missed blogging for you while I was gone. But I promised Christine I would not blog, so I didn't. Now I'm back in the saddle ready to keep providing you quality content that you can use as part of your low-carb lifestyle. THANK YOU for giving me a few days off and I look forward to the year 2007 which will be here before you know it!

Hopefully, my brother Kevin will make 2007 his banner year for a comeback with his weight and health. Otherwise, I don't think he's gonna have any more chances. YOU CAN DO IT, KEVIN! JUST DON'T GIVE UP! DON'T EVER GIVE UP!