Eggs Out, Embryos In, IVF Waiting Game Begins

Christine had two embryos implanted inside of her today

Since I last updated you on our IVF/ICSI process one week ago, so much has happened that was both unexpected and critical in this process that Christine and I have embarked upon to have a baby. THANK YOU to everyone who has been praying for us and supporting our efforts over these past few weeks as we've gone through this emotional and physical challenge. Knowing that so many people are thinking about us and rooting us on in this whirlwind journey has been very comforting.

Last week as she began taking the follicle stimulation shots, Christine's ovaries got bigger and bigger as those follicles, which hold the eggs, grew as well. Virtually going to the doctor for a vaginal ultrasound every single day to make sure they were growing properly, it led to the big day of retrieval on Thursday morning.

The long shots began for Christine this week when she had the hCG shot with an intramuscular needle on Tuesday night preparing for the egg retrieval and then the Progesterone hormone shots began on Friday morning. We had a friend from our church who has experience giving shots administer the hCG shot and she did awesome. But then on my first attempt to duplicate that same motion, I made Christine jump through the roof! EEEEK!

I already cringe just at the sight of a needle, but it makes it worse when you know you're causing pain to someone you love. Instead of trying to jab her, I decided the slow and steady approach would be best. And other than that initial pinch of the needle going in, Christine said it's not so bad. The hormone has to be in an oil-based form which makes it that much more difficult to get it inside of her. And she's got about two more weeks worth of this, too. I'm in such awe that she's willing to put herself through this just to have our baby. WOW!

We were anxiously awaiting how many eggs Christine produced and were very pleased when our reproductive endocrinologist said we had eight eggs after her surgery on Thursday morning. Christine was a little upset by this in the moments after the surgery, especially when she heard the 20-something woman on the other side of the curtain tell her husband that she got 27 eggs! Sheez, rub it in, why don't ya?! :)

But I assured Christine that eight is a good total number and we'll just see what happens from here. Well, out of those eight total eggs, six of them were viable for doing the ICSI process of placing the sperm in the center to see if they will fertilize. Because of my low quality sperm count, this was the only way we would even have a chance at making a baby together. And we were hopeful for the best!

On Friday, Christine got a call from the doctor midday while I was at the gym working out and he gave us the somewhat grim news--out of the six embryos, four didn't fertilize and were rendered useless while two of them fertilized. Because there were so few embryos that survived, the doctor moved up the transfer of the embryos inside of Christine to this morning (it was supposed to be Sunday morning at the earliest for a 3-day transfer and Tuesday at the latest for a 5-day transfer). But the thinking is Christine's womb is the best place for the embryos to continue to grow if they are going to. And so that's where they are right now.

In fact, that picture at the top of this blog post is of our two little ones that we hope will be growing inside of Christine real soon. The top one you'll notice has not split yet which makes it a Grade 4 embryo and less likely statistically to become a baby, but the bottom one has already split which makes it a Grade 2 embryo and fairly likely it will do what it has to do to grow and make Christine pregnant.

At this point, it is the waiting game. All of these shots, drugs, doctor visits, poking, prodding, and the like has led up to this moment--and we've got 12 days to think about it. Of course, we're already prepared if things don't work out like we hope. But we're staying positive knowing that God is in control and can make it happen in His will for our lives. He knows we want kids, but we're leaving it in His hands now and trusting in what will happen.

Although the money we are spending to do this has been a bit harrowing, we know the financial sacrifice will be worth it either way because of the peace of mind we will have. And ever since we announced our "Beads Of Hope" fundraiser recently, the response has been incredible. In fact, Christine wanted me to share with you a necklace, watch and earring set she made for a reader named Deborah.

Check it out:



Speaking of the bead jewelry, one of my readers suggested Christine make something we hadn't thought of. Here's what she wrote in an e-mail:

Hey, Christine:

I ready Jimmy's blog about your beading business, and I wanted you to know I'm wishing you success in the business and sending prayers for your IVF journey. I was looking at the samples of your work, and I think what I'm looking at are the watch bands, the pieces with a "hooking" clasp on both ends: I wanted to tell you those make fantastic Medic Alert bracelets. I've bought them in Cracker Barrel and Hallmark stores, and hooked the ends onto my Diabetes medallion. They turn a sterile-looking metal item into a fashion statement. All the best to you and Jimmy!

WOW, what a GREAT idea! So now you have that option for Christine to make as well to add to any orders you place with us. THANK YOU to this reader who made such an excellent suggestion.

She's so thrilled to take something she loves like bead jewelry-making and be able to bring in some extra income to help us pay for this. We will be continuing this fundraiser well beyond Christmas, so feel free to place an order anytime by sending an e-mail to Christine at muzikgirl@charter.net. Let her know your name, mailing address, what you would like to order, the color scheme of the jewelry, the sizes, and the quantities of each piece. Special thanks to everyone who has placed an order already, sent us beading materials, and even mailed donations to us because you care about us and want to help us as we continue on with this IVF cycle.


Christine preparing for the embryo transfer

That pretty little lady right there is my hero. She has literally put herself through so much over this past month and I can never tell her how much I love her for her selflessness through this entire process. We've become closer through this journey which is probably rare compared to the norm. But I think we've prepared ourselves for whatever happens so our marriage will remain rock solid whether she gets pregnant or not. The thoughts and prayers of those who love us has helped.

The next big date for us is Thursday, December 20, 2007 at 8:00am. That's the day we go back to the doctor for a blood pregnancy test. In the meantime, Christine will have a regimen of Progesterone with a long needle daily, a Medrol pill and two Doxycycline daily through December 12th, a Vivelle dot patch every other day, and a baby aspirin daily. We'll see if all these efforts work to produce a pregnancy just before Christmas. What an incredible present for 2007, eh? :D

For now, Christine is resting. She's got her beads out arranging them in order by shape and color ready to make some jewelry for presents and anyone who orders in our "Beads Of Hope" fundraiser while watching the Sci-Fi and Discovery Channel. She's been ordered to take it easy today and tomorrow, so that's what she's gonna do. I'm waiting on her hand and foot right now and taking care of whatever she needs (yes, I even made a pizza for her to eat--YIKES!).

Pray for us, wish us well, and hopefully my next IVF update will be a great big celebration that we're pregnant with at least one child. It'll be here sooner than we think, but the waiting is gonna be the hardest part of this entire process, especially for Christine who naturally likes to worry anyway (is that a girl thing or what?). Anyways, that's where we are for now.

If you missed the Newsweek article this week entitled "How Diet Affects Fertility," then be sure to check it out and then read Regina Wilshire's stern response to it. There's a whole lotta misinformation going on out there about how diet impacts your ability to have a child. It's interesting reading nonetheless.

Here's a little bit from my e-mail box over the past week:

Jimmy and Christine, I just wanted to lend my support and prayers to you during your IVF experience. God Bless you both and give you the desires of your heart.
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Hey, Jimmy --

I saw the post about the IVF process on your blog. I realize we don't know each other well, but if you don't mind, I'd like to pass along something that worked for us after nearly two years of trying.

A little background: we had friends who'd tried everything while going to specialists in LA. When they moved to New York, their new specialist told them (this was after $20,000 of treatments in LA), "You know, sometimes the woman is just a little too acidic for the little swimmers. Before we try anything expensive, I want you try mixing a teaspoon baking soda in a cup of water and douche with it about a half hour before you have sex." (Hope I'm not being too graphic here.)

So they did. Bingo, conception. So we tried it. Bingo, conception. Worked in bringing our second daughter in the world, too. We told another couple we knew who were having problems and ... yes, Bingo.

Anyway, I know how trying over and over can get frustrating -- I have a whole bit about in my standup routine -- so I thought I'd pass it along. You never know.

Best of luck.
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I am praying so hard for both of you right now!!!!!

My friend went through this TWICE! Yes, TWICE. 10K+ each time. No, they are not rich either, but, the loans they took out, the perks they did without to have 2 of the most precious children was to them...priceless.

I have known them for years. In fact, for her 4th attempt (first 3 attempts failed) I went with her. I sat and massaged her head and sang Paul Anka's "Having A (my) Baby" using words that matched her and her husbands life. And she has a beautiful baby boy from that!!

Anyway, it is about you two, not anyone else. Right now you need all the positive energy and focus and that is what you got from, I am sure many more people that count and also, I believe from the man that matters most.

Having a baby--What a lovely way of saying how much love each other,
Having a baby--What a lovely way of saying your thinking of the other--you can see its face a glowin'--we can see in your eyes you're happy to know it!

Keep it up, this is the most important thing in your whole life, and if I could I would pay for it ALL for ya. But, my prayers seem to carry some weight so you got those coming full force!
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I'm not trying to be trite, but can I suggest that you both have your Vitamin D blood levels checked? If they are not around 40ng/ml that might be contributing to the problem.
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Jimmy & Christine-

Good luck on the meds. I remember it well. And I'm sure with the proper guidance, Jimmy, you could do the shots for Christine.

The Progesterone shots are definitely no fun so tell your lovely wife to massage the area right after so the solution doesn't cause welts.

You'll get through it. Don't worry.
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Best of luck with your IVF cycle. The Progesterone shots are the worst part of it -- I found that icing the area, and warming the progesterone in my hand, helped.

To the poster who suggested NaPro Technology, please don't spout off when you don't know what you're talking about. Their "technology" is just tracking your natural fertility signs and using ovulation predictor kits. This can be helpful for couples with relatively simple fertility issues, but does nothing at all for tubal infertility, complete failure to ovulate, or male factor infertility (which is Jimmy's diagnosis).

It'd be nice if there were a simpler, cheaper fix than IVF, but for many fertility problems, that just isn't the case. If you aren't thoroughly familiar with the underlying medical issues behind infertility, please let the couple be guided by their doctors, rather than offering useless "advice."
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The "My Weight Loss For Life" blog wrote the following in a post this week:

Jimmy Moore has a great low-carb site. He's also detailing the progress of his and his wife's IVF treatments, so if you're interested in either, this is a great site to check out. If you like it, check out the link to buy his wife's handmade jewelry. They're raising money to pay for a $18,000 IVF bill.
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As someone who finally became a father at age 45 and now has two adorable girls, I wish you all the luck in the world on the embryo transfer. Fatherhood is work, but it's also a joy. (The work is part of the joy, believe it or not. I think men thrive on having a purpose.)

12-10-07 UPDATE: Because so many people have requested a way to make a donation towards our IVF expenses, you'll now notice a "DONATE" button at the top of the right side of the blog. Participation is completely voluntary and we sincerely appreciate all of the kind gestures of generosity that have come our way during this process. We are still taking orders for Christine's homemade bead jewelry, too, so let us know if you'd like to have her make you something. She LOVES them beads! :)

An IVF Update: Shots Galore And So Much More

All of THIS just to have an IVF baby? Yep, that's right!

Since I last updated you on our decision to start the IVF/ICSI cycle to try to have a baby, the process is now well underway with tons of shots, doctor visits, tests, blood work, and one big fat loan to tell you about. More about all of that in just a moment.

Special thanks to everyone who has responded to our "Beads Of Hope" fundraiser that will help us defray the costs of our medical expenses during this procedure. The total cost is going to come to about $18,000 for one cycle and thankfully we were approved for a Capital One fertility loan for most of that money. We'll be paying it back over the next five years, so every little bit of money we can raise through these homemade beads Christine creates will help us pay for what could be the miracle we've been praying for regarding having a child.

Not everyone is happy about our "Beads Of Hope" campaign, though. One of my readers expressed her sincere disgust for my decision to use my blog for what she describes as "panhandling." Here's what she wrote in an e-mail to me:

"I may turn out to be in a small minority -- I think your panhandling through your web site is truly inappropriate. For the low-carb planet, you have been a valuable resource. By selling your wife's beaded creations to pay your medical bills, your have gone beyond boundaries of propriety."

While I respect and appreciate the opinions of those who disagree with our fundraiser, it was my decision to do this and I don't regret it one bit. I have had readers suggest that I put a PayPal link on my blog so they can pay me for the work I do here at my blog. I have refused because to me that would be in poor taste. But by offering something in return for those funds like the bead jewelry, it is in my estimation a natural trade-off of funds for merchandise. No problem in my eyes.

Nevertheless, we are not discouraged by those who disagree with the fundraiser. Nobody is being forced to participate in it and yet you still get the same quality low-carb content you always have absolutely FREE every single day at my blog. I provide it willingly because it is the cry of my heart to help others find the success that I have since 2004. That commitment will NEVER change.

Okay, so let's talk about the IVF cycle that began the day after Thanksgiving. My wife Christine is a real trooper and I have the utmost respect for her and anyone willing to put themselves through all these shots and drugs just to have a baby. What a sacrifice of pain and anguish she has put up with to try to make this work and I love her more than ever for being willing to do this for us. THANK YOU AND I LOVE YOU, HONEY!

Here's the rundown of all the shots and drugs she has had to take on a daily basis for the past week:

9:00AM
Lupron 20 units (injected in the belly with a subcutaneous needle)
Gonal-F 150 (injected in the belly with a subcutaneous needle)
Doxycycline 100mg (taken orally)
Baby Aspirin (taken orally)

9:00PM
Lupron 20 units (injected in the belly with a subcutaneous needle)
Menopur 150 (injected in the belly with a subcutaneous needle)
Doxycycline 100mg (taken orally)

I have faithfully prepared each of these shots for Christine and she has dutifully injected them herself for over a week now alternating back and forth between one side of her belly button and the other. The purpose of these shots is to stimulate the follicles on her ovaries to help them grow to around 18mm for ideal egg-making.

She had a baseline visit on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving and then a follow-up on Wednesday and Friday this week. A vaginal ultrasound was done to determine whether the follicles are growing like they are supposed to and the good news is they are. As of Friday, many of the follicles have reach 12-13mm in size and are well on the way to being ready for egg retrieval on this coming Wednesday or Thursday morning.

In fact, the follicles on her ovaries right now are so big that Christine says it feels like she has "a watermelon in my abdomen." My response back to her was that it is "preparing you for when you have babies inside of you real soon." She smiled and said "yeah, I know." It's getting closer and closer!

We are scheduled to go to the reproductive endocrinologist on Sunday morning bright and early for one last ultrasound to make sure Christine is ready and it looks like she will be. They have seen about 10 follicles grow which is excellent news because each one has the potential to make an egg we can use for the IVF/ICSI procedure. The more eggs we have, the better odds that several viable embryos will be ready for the transfer back inside Christine.

And the shots will continue this week for Christine and they get a little worse. While all of these needles she has had so far have been subcutaneous, meaning just below the skin, many of the next ones will be intramuscular (around 1 1/2 inches long) which will require us to seek assistance from a nurse friend of ours from church to help with. I'm absolutely terrified of needles personally or I'd try to stick Christine myself. My hands would probably shake too much, though.

The main shot will be the hCG IM that is administered 36 hours before the retrieval of the eggs. That means it will be either 8:00pm Monday night or Tuesday night depending on what the doctor says after the visit on Sunday morning. The egg and sperm retrieval will take place on Wednesday morning or Thursday morning where the doctors will conduct the actual procedure of placing the motile sperm in the middle of each egg to see if they will fertilize. This takes 3-5 days to happen.

Then the real "fun" begins for Christine when she begins taking DAILY shots of Progesterone 50mg/mL with an intramuscular needle in the morning, a 0.1mg dot patch of Virelle in the morning, Medrol 16mg in the evening, along with the Doxycycline and baby aspirin.

The torture for her body just doesn't stop, does it?

But all of this is preparing Christine for the transfer back of the viable embryos that survive after a few days. If there are only a couple still around after three days, then the transfer will happen on Saturday or Sunday morning. Otherwise, if the embryos continue to do well and look good through five days, then the transfer will go as planned on Monday or Tuesday morning a week from now.

From there, we wait two weeks while continuing to take the hormone shots to see if the embryos continue to develop inside Christine's womb and on or about December 24th we will know whether or not she is pregnant. It's rather ironic all of this anticipation builds up to that particular date because either way it will be a gift from God.

If He chooses to bless us with a child or children, then what an awesome Christmas present that would be. But if not, we will at least have that "peace of mind" I blogged about previously. We're ready for whatever His will is for us in this.

Obviously, we would love to have your prayers as we continue down this journey to have a baby and what an adventurous ride it has been so far. We really are lucky people to have so many amazing human beings show us the love and dignity that literally hundreds of you have done over the past couple of months. Our gratitude and appreciation for your support cannot be any greater than it is right now. So THANK YOU for showering us with your encouraging words during this time.

The next time I update you will be after the transfer of the embryo expected in about 8-10 days. This next week is crucial in the entire IVF/ICSI process, so pray for us, the doctors and nurses, and those tiny little zygotes that will be formed. One or more of those could be a baby Moore nine months from now. Here's hoping! :)

Here are some more e-mails we have received about our IVF journey:

Please, before you pay so much money for IVF, let me alert you to NaPro Technology. Their success rate is much higher than IVF and much less expensive. They are a Catholic institution, but don't let that put you off, they accept all patients!

Check out their web site:

Pope Paul VI Institute
6901 Mercy Road
Omaha, Nebraska 68106

God bless!
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Hi Jimmy,

Just wondering have you thought about doing IVF in Ireland? An IVF cycle here costs about 3000 euro ($4394) for each IVF cycle. Including return flights and accommodations it would be cheaper to do it here.

I know it seems like a wild idea but I hate to think of you and Christine would have to shelling out so much money. According to this article, it's seen as unethical to make money from infertility treatment and I think that's the way it should be.
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Dear Jimmy and Christine,

You and your wife will be in my prayers for sure for the next couple of months. I have a great burden for those wanting a child and have not been able to conceive. There are times I wonder why God gave me 14 children and the next couple none. But may you and your wife be pleasantly surprised by what God has in store for you in the near future. As you and your wife have been givers to so many, He will reward you beyond all that you can ask or think.

Blessings to you both,

Michigan Mommy of Many
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Dear Jimmy,

I recently read your blog about your struggle with infertility. My husband and I used ICSI/IVF in 2004 and our twin daughters are now 3 years old.

My book, Tiny Toes: A Couple’s Journey Through Infertility, Prematurity, and Depression was just released. I'd be happy to send you a complimentary copy. Maybe reading about our journey will help you with yours. You can visit my web site to learn more about the book.

Best luck to you and Christine. It's an exciting, emotional and trying time all at once!

Best regards,

Kelly Damron

We received Kelly's book in the mail this week and I'll be reading and reviewing it soon. I appreciate her generosity in sending me a copy of her new book which looks to be an OUTSTANDING resource for anyone going through this IVF process.

And finally, let me give a big shout out to the "Debt Daddy" blog for helping me promote our "Beads Of Hope" fundraiser. Here's what he wrote:

Speaking of kids and fathers, I came across this guy a while back and wanted to pass his name along to you. Jimmy Moore has been blogging for quite some time - one of his most read blogs is "Livin' La Vida Low-Carb" (which is just the kind of kitchy title that makes Debt Daddy giggle). Anyway, he and his wife have been trying to have children for quite some time, but have had no luck, and are now turning to IVF (IVF = in vitro fertilization, for anyone who doesn't know what the heck I'm babbling about).

IVF can get pretty expensive, but have no fear! Believe it or not, Capital One now offers an "infertility loan" to finance the long (hopefully successful) road of making a baby with doctors present. So, whether or not their attempt to procreate is successful, they will still be paying back this loan with interest. Fortunately, Jimmy's wife has a sideline business that they're hoping will help to supplement some of the expenses and get this loan paid down.

If you're still looking for Holiday gifts for people on your list, you might want to check out this link - Jimmy's wife Christine makes some very pretty beaded jewelry, and purchasing some of her handiwork would not only make a lovely gift to whomever you're giving it to, but to the people you bought it from as well.

WOW, now that was too cool! I don't know who you are Debt Daddy, but God bless you buddy! You are an honorable guy and we appreciate your selfless support for us as we go down this road. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

We've Decided To Give An IVF Cycle A Chance For Peace Of Mind

The continued outpouring of prayers and support for me and Christine regarding our problem with having a baby has been absolutely incredible. The way you have embraced us, cried with us, shared in the pain, and offered gentle words of encouragement and advice has been our stronghold in the midst of an extremely difficult decision we have been contemplating regarding our next step in this process.

This has been at least five months in the making and started back in July when we found out we both had issues that have made a pregnancy difficult. Christine then had endometriosis surgery three months ago and has been given the green light on baby-making. My issue is with low sperm quality which has had Christine and I using terms like IVF, ICSI, and donor sperm.

Like I said, your amazing response to our infertility woes has been nothing short of incredible. For those of you who have been through this entire process and shared your experience with us, THANK YOU doesn't even begin to show our sincere appreciation and respect for you. As we've gone through the emotional rollercoaster about what to do, Christine and I have made our decision--we've decided to give an IVF cycle a chance for peace of mind.

The more we thought about this decision, the easier our choice became. If we refused to even TRY to do an IVF cycle, then the likelihood of getting pregnant on 8% quality sperm and Christine's endometriosis returning after she gets off of birth control are next to nothing. Yes, I believe in the miracle-working power of God to make it happen in His will. But the reality is the odds are very slim.

Regarding adoption, that's still an open option if this IVF cycle we attempt does not work. And let me just say, we're not at all opposed to adoption. It's a beautiful thing that actually mimics what God Himself did for us by adopting us as sons and daughters into His family when we accept him as our Abba Father. The act of adoption is very sacred and I greatly admire anyone who chooses this pathway.

But the reality of adoption is it is a very difficult, bumpy ride for vulnerable couples not knowing for sure whether they'll even get their baby or not. And the wait is usually at least two years, tens of thousands of dollars, emotional ups and down, and on and on. Christine and I spoke with a couple in our church who has done one international adoption and is still in the midst of a domestic one as we speak. The administrative Hell they put you through along with all the aforementioned issues make this an extremely unattractive option for people like me and Christine.

So we're back to the IVF decision we have made. Here's the thinking on why we are doing this: We're gonna give it ONE chance to work. Yes, this singular opportunity has odds of about 40-50% of working at a total cost of around $18,000. Sounds like a lot of money and it is. Thankfully we were approved by Capital One for an infertility loan and will be paying this off over the next five years. But regardless of what happens, it will be money well spent.

If we go through this process and Christine gets pregnant, then the money will have been well spent. Thanks to the specialized ICSI process where the best-looking sperm is placed in the center of the egg for fertilization, this greatly increases the chance that is indeed what will happen. It's a hit or miss proposition, but at least you're able to play the game where you wouldn't otherwise.

However, you might be wondering how we will feel shelling out all that money if for some reason God forbid this IVF/ICSI doesn't work. We thought and prayed about this for a very long time and it was not an easy conclusion for Christine and I to come to. But here it is: We will be sad if the IVF/ICSI fails to produce a pregnancy. But we are prepared for that now so we'll know how to react if it actually happens.

Christine has said she'll probably need a few days to come to grips with the reality of not having a child this way. But afterwards we will simply accept this as our lot in life to be without a biological child of our own (still keeping the adoption option open for the future) and have the peace of mind that we at least gave the IVF/ICSI an opportunity to work. We'll never have to look back and regret that we NEVER tried. Our chance is NOW and it's one we're willing to take either way.

Is the money scary? Heck yeah! My job is what you see me doing here at my blog and other related web sites on a daily basis. It's a non-traditional means for income, but has been paying the bills for about a year. I'm expecting an increase in sponsorship in 2008 with several interested companies, but nothing is guaranteed. If my business takes off like I believe it will, then there are no worries.

Even still, it's always good to have backup plans for raising some extra money. That's where we hope to get YOU involved in this process. In the next few days, I'll be posting about some homemade bead jewelry that my sweetheart Christine has made to sell to anyone interested in helping us in this cause. This is a fundraising venture that will give us the financial assistance we need while giving you a chance to receive an extra special Christmas present for someone in your life (maybe even a little something something for yourself!). :D Stay tuned for more details about that coming soon.

Meanwhile, we went to our IVF orientation on Wednesday this week where a nurse went over the schedule of all the shots, tests, treatments, retrieval of the eggs and sperm, and the embryo transfer details as well as how to administer about 60 shots in 10 days! EEEEK! I'm terrified of needles and cannot imagine what Christine is gonna have to go through, especially with the one that goes into her bottom for two months in a row. She's gonna have another pain in the butt besides me now. :P

We go to the reproductive endocrinologist's office next Wednesday to get baseline readings for Christine right before our trip to Virginia to be with Christine's family for Thanksgiving. She immediately begins the shots and I've been warned that this could impact her mood adversely. Hoo boy! Lord, I pray now for mercy and gentleness from that dear sweet woman I call my wife so she doesn't rippeth my headeth off during this process! LOL!

In my next post about our quest to have a baby, I'll share with you the names of these shots Christine will be taking and talk about the process of going through an IVF/ICSI cycle. We're ready to give this a go--good, bad, or ugly! We just want to be able to say in the end that we used this open door of opportunity and never regret our decision. And we won't.

Pray for Christine as she begins taking these shots next week that she will be strong. She's a lot better at them that I'd ever be, so I'm honored she would go through this to have OUR baby. I love that woman now more than ever before!

Check out some more feedback we've received from readers as well as related news regarding infertility and IVF:

Hello Jimmy,

You get so much mail, I don't want to waste your time with a lot of unnecessary words. Let me just first say I love your blog. You are a talented, witty writer and I believe you are doing your readers a great service by supplying such informative and interesting health news and interviews.

But my real reason for writing is to express my sympathies for the problems you and Christine are having in trying to conceive a child. As a mother of four, with four miscarriages in my history as well, I know a little of the pain you have suffered. I would just like to leave you with something to reflect upon during your decision making process regarding IVF.

I take it you are a Christian, from what I've inferred from your writing. From that point of view, I think it is imperative to remember that IVF almost invariably results in "unusable" embryos being destroyed or discarded. I don't know what your belief is regarding when life begins, but even if you think it might begin at conception, then you may want to give further thought (or get an honest answer from your doctor) to the IVF process.

I know this is a painful time in your life. May God bless you and lead you in the right direction.
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ABC News: "Eating Soy May Slash Sperm Count"
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Jimmy,

Now that you've found the science that will work, now it is time to turn to religion. By this I mean the resources of the family values movement, aka the church, or the theocracy crowd, aka church-based social services. Not, my favorite people. But, there is a reason to look here for financial assistance.

I imagine, but I do not know, that they are very much anti- the sperm-donor thing, so the fact that you make the effort to see beyond the humanist answer, a bad answer in their view means that they should be on your side. They have the money. Heck the Bush administration is handing out tax dollars to these entities like crazy. So cycle through the fundamentalist churches and find someone that can help.

I'm attending my girlfriend's Catholic church. A few weeks ago, an organization came forward needing us to evangelize their services. They get government money, so they needed patients to keep the money flowing. The patients didn't need to be Catholic or religious.

Make the calls even if you don't go to church. Your tax dollars paid for these services. Access them. They are there waiting. You may also find some financial assistance from your State government, but I'd have no idea who to ask.

Beyond that, get a PayPal account and tie it to your blog and websites. Start a new website just to generate contributions. Have you put your blog content into a book yet?
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Hi Jimmy!

I too would like to make a plea for adoption. I agree with the lady who stated that everything happens for a reason. Perhaps there is a reason for those who cannot conceive? Perhaps their baby, should they have one, will face health problems, be they mental or physical. Another reason for infertility could be that God knows how overpopulated we are, and it’s his way of controlling the population.

For myself, I looked at all of the struggles I have faced in my life, cancer, diabetes, epilepsy, abuse, Lyme disease, obesity, obsessive compulsive disorders, and I decided that it was not worth the risk of my own happiness, to put a child through any of these possibilities. All are hereditary, including abuse! I just could not do that to anyone, let alone my own kid. Life is hard! I even made the decision not to adopt because some of my issues are behavioral, and could be “taught” to a child. I would not wish obsessive compulsive disorders on my worst enemy!

On another note, there is the cost that you mentioned, that is just astronomical. Have you also considered this? Not only will you have this tremendous debt, or deficit, but there is also the cost of raising a child in and of itself. Don’t even get me started on how much you would have to save starting right now, to put a child through college! At least $500 a month I believe is the current statistic. Will you be able to adequately provide for a child after spending that much money conceiving? Provide for them as well as you would like to? Back to adoption, wouldn’t it be better to put your hard earned money into the life of a child who needs it right now, rather than spend tens of thousands of dollars trying to create a new life?

I know that people want their “own” child, but I am half adopted. My father died when my mother was pregnant with me. When I was one and a half, she married a man who took on me and my three brothers; he adopted us 4 years later. Never in my life did I call him my step-dad, or my adopted dad, despite the fact that he was probably the worst dad in the world. To me, the one who raises you is your mom and dad. Blood has nothing to do with it. It’s the ones who stayed up with you when you were sick, or read to you every night ‘til you went to sleep, or who helped you through those auditions for the school play. Those are the parents, the true moms and dads.

And when considering adoption, if you go that route, also consider adopting an older child instead of being put on a wait-list for an infant. So many children out there need homes.

OK, that’s my two cents, for what it’s worth. I know that no matter what the decision, you and Christine will make great parents. I wish you the best of luck in making your decision. I know the decision not to have a child at all was the hardest one I ever made, so I wish you well in making yours.
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Jimmy,

Today’s the first time I’ve read your blog – it came up in a Google Alert I’d set a couple years ago for IVF/ICSI. My husband and I underwent the process just about two years ago, and now we have a 14-month-old boy. We couldn’t get pregnant because my husband’s sperm morphology was zero percent. In fact, all of his counts were very low, so that made ICSI perfect for us. Actually, I’ve read that a majority of IVF cycles are done with ICSI these days, just because it ups the success rate so much.

We live in Des Moines and used the University of Iowa’s excellent IVF center. We also used the “insurance” program and spent about $15,000 on it, plus about another $3,000 on the drugs. Today I tell people that I would pay a hundred times that for our son. I think U of I’s program refunds the money if the pregnancy results in a miscarriage before 10 weeks, and since most miscarriages happen by that time, we felt like it was a reasonable risk, especially since none of my tests showed anything suspicious. Plus, if you do miscarry and they have any extra embryos frozen, they’ll try again with those at no extra cost. Also, they keep a close eye on you once you’re pregnant to make sure hormone levels are good, and they’ll make sure you have progesterone supplements, which helps support the pregnancy.

We took out a home equity loan, which we just recently paid off when we sold our home, to pay for the treatment. I think if I hadn’t tried it, I would always have regretted it, because I wanted to know what it was like to have my biological child. I’m adopted myself, and my husband and I will likely adopt the rest of our children, but I’m so glad I went through IVF/ICSI. The emotional roller coaster is such a faded, distant memory now.

As for the process itself – it’s pretty intense. Your wife will have daily shots in the legs and hip (they really aren’t more than a prick), blood work every two or three days once the cycle starts and then a couple ultrasounds to check on how the eggs are growing and when they should be retrieved. The retrieval is really easy since they’ll put her under. I wasn’t sore or anything – just a little groggy afterwards. And, of course, your part is a breeze!

Then, you’ll hear the next day how many eggs were fertilized and are growing. We only had three fertilize, which is fewer than most women, and I was so disappointed because I thought there might not be enough to have a really good embryo to implant. But, three days later, when we went back for the transfer, we got a photo of the embryos and were told that two of them were “perfect.” They were both transferred and we got to watch the whole thing on a giant ultrasound screen in the room. The doctor pointed out the two “sparkles” as they were being transferred, which still gives me goose bumps when I think about it. We didn’t end up with twins, but the fact that one of those little sparkles is now my funny, sweet little guy is just amazing.

I did try to remind myself that there’s more than one way to build a family, but in the end, I would have always wondered if I hadn’t at least tried the IVF/ICSI. Good luck to you and your wife, whatever you decide.
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Jimmy,

First let me begin by saying I enjoy your blog and I was turned on to it by my reproductive endocrinologist Dr. Gil Wilshire. I have to tell you my home is a 90 minute drive from his office and the ride home was not to pleasant after my first visit there, he made no bones about the changes I needed to make to my diet in order to get healthy and to eventually conceive.

To make a long story short I’ve been living a low carb lifestyle for almost 8 months now and I’ve lost nearly 60 pounds and seen dramatic changes to my PCOS symptoms. I am writing to you today because I am completely on the same wavelength concerning the costs associated with the treatment of infertility. I always say that if my plumbing worked then I could have dozens of kids and no one would say a word and my insurance would cover much of the cost, but since we are struggling we have all kinds of hoops to jump through and little or no help from our insurance.

My husband and I have been married for nearly 7 years and we share your concerns about the cost of these treatments. There is pressure from the doctors, they see these problems everyday and it is easy for them to tell people to commit thousands of dollars, but do they realize what it is like to pay those bills if things don’t go as hoped. It is an incredible burden to know that there is something wrong with your body and you may not be able to have children, then add to it that you are preventing your spouse from having children too and it is enough to make anyone feel desperate enough to do just about anything.

I know that you are a Christian and I encourage you to pray and seek God on this matter. It has been my faith that has kept me going, I’ve said for years that I know God will give us children. We have been tremendously blessed four years ago our nephew came to live with us and is now like a son to us, and 2 months ago today we adopted a beautiful baby girl. We still desire to have a successful pregnancy, but we will take whatever we can get. For now we are just hanging out eating right and counting days, if we don’t become pregnant in a few months we will take additional steps.

I realize your situation is different, please feel free to call me, I would be happy to share with you why we are not in favor of IVF and the other costly treatments. Your blog has given me lots of good support and I would love to reciprocate. God makes people parents in ways that are unconventional and sometimes medically impossible.
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FOX News: "Study: The Sexier The Walk, The Less Fertile The Woman"
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My husband and I went through an (unsuccessful) IVF cycle back in 2003/2004, and I’m more than happy to answer any questions you have about it via email.

Our case was a little different than yours, my husband had great sperm count/motility, but I have severe PCOS which means I don’t ovulate at all on my own – we had to use mega doses of hormones to get me to respond at all, and although we transferred 3 perfect embryos, none of them implanted, which was absolutely heartbreaking.

I later found out that I have a inherited problem called Factor V Leiden which makes implantation and carrying a pregnancy to term very difficult, and we had to re-evaluate everything at that point. With the cost of drugs and IVF at $15,000-$20,000, we just couldn’t justify going through the emotional stress of another cycle.

I wasn’t able to “let go” until I sold my leftover drugs. Now, at 35 years old, we’ve not ruled out trying again, but haven’t decided on it yet either. I still weigh about 400 lbs, and want to wait until I’ve lost the weight I need to lose before even considering it. I know for sure that the DS I’m having in January will force me to eat more protein/less carbs, and I’m sure that will help as well. Maybe we won’t even need to go to an reproductive endocrinologist and we’ll just get lucky. I’m more than happy to talk about anything related to our experience, all you need to do is ask.
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Jimmy-

We did two rounds of IVF/ICSI that resulted in our beautiful twin girls.
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Jimmy and Christine,
My wife and I went through IVF/ICSI in 2000 and we now have 7-year old twin boys. We had to do ICSI for the same reason, low motility--my boys couldn't get past the goal keeper.

We went through the whole injection thing and harvesting the eggs and then waiting to see how many eggs 'took' and then the implanting of the fertilized eggs and then the waiting to see if we were pregnant. Oh yeah, the cash, we spent about $20,000, it hurt--I was a firefighter and my wife worked in the dental field--we weren't rolling in the dough, but we have two wonderful healthy wild and crazy boys!!

I would spend whatever it takes again and again to achieve what we have now, it's only money and if it takes 20 years to pay it off--who cares. You can always make more money Jimmy.
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Jimmy and Christine:

My husband and I experienced this infertility roller coaster from 1999 to 2003. While it seems like a long period of time, we were only in treatment for about 18 months in 2002 and 2003. At the time we did not have health insurance that covered assisted reproduction (by the time we got coverage, we felt that we were too old to become first time parents and it was just too difficult for us to jump back on the emotional roller coaster of treatments).

During that time we ultimately underwent 2 IVF/ICSI cycles, once using my own eggs and once using donor eggs. Unfortunately both cycles were unsuccessful and we have since decided to live child-free. While my husband and I were unsuccessful, I would always have been haunted by the "what ifs" if we had not tried.
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Jimmy and Christine,

I would like to say may God be with you on your journey to parenthood, wherever that may lead you. Please keep in mind and always remember - with God all things are possible.

All the posts I read about this was either about adoption or the cost of IVF/ICSI. Not one blogger said anything about the cost involved with adoption, or the heartache that goes with it when a child goes back to their birth mother "because the courts said so."

Its a shame that there are people out there that are basically baby making machines (sometimes with siblings that have different fathers-or the fathers are unknown,AND that many of these children are born out of wedlock!) and that the government is providing for them(welfare & food stamps and in some cases child support because the parent or parents are in jail). These same people get free birth control, free prenatal care, and the cost of having the baby is free, then the immunizations are free and they go onto medicade and then their medical care is free, not to mention the WIC & Food For Families programs-which benefits the mother while pregnant and the baby til age 6.

Yet the government does nothing to help people who really want kids to get them, whether it is by adoption or medically helping the couple to conceive, their own biological child.

Then there are the people that really want children and can't for one reason or another, or people that have to go through fertility treatments to have one and basically get so in debt that it makes life harder for them to live - especially if they end up with multiple births.

I have friends that are foster parents, I know others that have adopted a child, I have friends that were adopted and my brother and his wife had to go thru fertility procedures to have their two children. I have one child and would like another, but it has not happened yet. The emotional rollercoaster you go thru while trying to conceive is UNBELIEVABLE!!!

My heart goes out to you and Christine. If your faith is strong and your marriage is strong, ya'll will be able to conquer this, and come out on top!

Basically it's gonna be expensive whichever way ya'll decide to go, and I think the joy of having a child is worth the cost of the procedure to get it. Counseling to keep ya'll together and will help ya'll to deal with all the emotional ups and downs as well as the financial burdens. Counseling is a good thing and it doesn't matter if it is from your church or from the medical profession. Always make time for you and Christine, no matter what, and remember "The family that prays together, stays together."
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Jimmy,

I have been following your pregnancy efforts. I know what it's like to be
dealing with this. I had 3 ectopic pregnancies in 1980, 81 and 82. Had to
decide if IVF was the next step. We opted not to for a variety of reasons
and feel now it was the right decision. I wish you both the very best. My
thoughts and prayers go out to both of you.
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MSN/Today Show: "8 Dos and Don'ts: Diet Tips For Pregnancy"
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Hi Jimmy!

I enjoy following your blog and have been a very firm believer in La Vida Low Carb since I was a teen. I was reading your story and frustration with not being able to have a baby and IVF. I wanted to drop you a little note and let you know the BIGGEST way low carb has helped me!

When I was about 18, I started noticing hair loss and hair in unwanted places. I was gaining at an alarming speed, despite not really eating that much. After crying to my doctor to please figure out what was wrong with me, I finally got a diagnosis--PCOS--when I was 23. I read all about it and decided to be real about Atkins. Working full time and going to nursing school full time I was still able to be extremely faithful to 20 carbs a day.

After only about 3 months I lost 30 pounds! My PCOS symptoms greatly improved. Then I started to feel very sick. I was pregnant! I was on BC at the time for my PCOS, not even trying to get pregnant! I was told I would have a very difficult time because of virtually no periods and one of my tubes was blocked by a cyst. When I had an ultrasound, my cyst was gone! 3 short months of LC and I had shrank a cyst and completely renewed my metabolism.

Then, this year after a few years of not being on LC I got serious again. My PCOS was worsening and I felt terrible. I was on Atkins again and lost 21 pounds in 3 weeks! Next thing I know---I am pregnant AGAIN! I was very happy with just being able to have 1, but 2----it blows my mind. So I am 18 weeks pregnant and owe it all to the Low Carb Life! I will tell anyone who will listen how Atkins got me pregnant twice...most don't believe me but it is definitely true! After the baby comes, I am going for Atkins again with more than 120 pounds to lose.

I love your story and your site! I wish you all the best in everything!
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Jimmy/Christine --

I don't have firsthand experience with IVF procedures, although my husband and I did struggle to get pregnant. We had one successful pregnancy out of three, and our boy/girl twins will be two this month!

We have some very good friends who did IVF. Out of four rounds of IVF, they have one little girl. The first round resulted in miscarriage. The second round is when they had their daughter; she was one of three embryos to implant. The third and fourth rounds were completely unsuccessful -- no pregnancies either time. With that said, we were also in labor and delivery classes with three couples who had undergone IVF successfully, so it does work.

In the end, the cost to undergo IVF versus the cost to adopt is about equal -- most places put the estimates at $20,000. Adoption isn't a guarantee of a baby, either -- heaps of red tape, long waits for paperwork to be finalized and processed, and then you wait for a baby to become available. . . unless you adopt overseas, which brings another set of challenges with it. . .

Have you guys considered having the IVF done out of the country? America has some wonderful technology, but there are other countries not far behind us -- in fact, there are hospitals in India that are managed by a health care company in Dallas, TX! As a rule, the cost to have a procedure done outside the U.S. is roughly 1/3 to 1/2 what you would pay here. . .

Just a thought. . .

Best wishes to you both!
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Hi Jimmy,

Please know that you and Christine have my total support in your quest to have a baby of your own. You both in my thoughts. Again, I admire your honesty in laying out the various reasons why you are having problems conceiving. I don't think that there are a whole lot of guys out there that will candidly admit that part of the problem lies with them. I have every expectation that the happy day will come when you post about the arrival of your child. And I look forward to that day.
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Jimmy,

Some doctors who do IVF recommend acupuncture prior to and during the IVF process and find it to be very helpful. Thought I would pass this along.
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Hi Jimmy:

I was reading your blog today and saw what you and Christine are going through right now with IVF/ICSI.

I have sent you a link with pictures of my two sons (BEAUTIFUL BOYS!) who were BOTH born from IVF/ICSI. My husband also had a horrible sperm count and we were told we would probably never have a baby of our own. We went through 2 fresh cycles and 2 frozen embryo transfer cycles, so we've done it all. One is a frozen baby and the other is a fresh baby!

ICSI has been around for almost 12 years. It is now standard procedure in most good clinics. For the most part, it has essentially "cured" male infertility, so feel confident you are using a well established method.

Make sure you understand if your clinic does a Day 3 embryo transfer or a Day 5 blastocyst transfer. I had both and only Day 3 worked. Day 5 is not the end all/cure all that it is sometimes advertised. Day 5 is often pushed to reduce the risk of multiples. I have tons of info on this subject, so let me know if you need more.

So much of your success is riding on the quality of the lab and the embryologist. He is the single most important person in this equation. Ask your clinic if they are certified and what training they have.

Lastly, try to ignore everyone's ridiculous and obnoxious comments and advice. Going through IVF was the hardest and best thing that ever happened to us. It changed our lives. So many people take for granted the ability to have a child. It is often the uneducated that make the most hurtful comments.

They have no idea what you two are going thru. Just like I cannot even begin to imagine what a cancer survivor feels, someone who has never experienced infertility has no idea what it is like. I always try to remember that before I judge people too harshly.

I know how hard this is, and how very few people understand the incredibly difficult decisions you and Christine are facing right now.

We spent about $36,000 for our children. Boy, that would have been a heck of a vacation, huh? Do I ever think about that money? NEVER. Did I worry that it was all for nothing the two times it failed and I was not pregnant? Yes. What is most important is that you have a good doctor, a great lab and come armed with facts.

Please call me if you would like to discuss, I'm a research nerd and I know more than any normal person should about IVF. My doctor often joked that I should come to work for him.

I wish you all the best and send you fertile thoughts. I assume you'll keep everyone posted on your progress with the blog.
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Dear Jimmy, regarding your recent post about contemplating IVF, please consider the following argument against it. I know it can seem like the medical technology involved is not any different from any other medical procedures intended to heal sickness, correct deformities, etc., but creating life (something we are to do in a way that reflects we are made as an image and likeness of God) is in an entirely different category from using scientific know-how to heal sickness. A human life is not a product you have a right to purchase because you want one. Please consider applying all the money this procedure would cost you towards adopting a child who needs you and Christine to be his parents. May God bless you and give you the wisdom to walk in His ways.

"Babies in Test Tubes" by Rev. Tadeusz Pacholczyk

When I give talks about in vitro fertilization (IVF), I usually ask my audience the following question: "How many of you know a baby born by IVF, or know a couple who has tried to get pregnant this way?" Usually about half the hands in the room go up. Then I ask them to raise their hands if the couple was Catholic. Virtually all the same hands go up a second time. I have the sense that Catholics are making use of IVF at about the same rate as non-Catholics, and that most of them are only vaguely aware of the Church's position on making test tube babies.

When asked why IVF might be immoral, people will usually mention the extra embryos that are frozen or discarded. Such embryos are certainly a serious concern, but they are not the primary reason the Church insists the procedure is immoral. Even if IVF were done without making any extra embryos at all, this way of making babies would still be morally objectionable, because the procedure strikes at the very core and meaning of marital sexuality.

It substitutes an act of laboratory manipulation for an act of bodily union between spouses. It turns procreation into production. IVF is really the flip-side of contraception: rather than trying to have sex without babies, we try to have babies without sex. Because many Americans have come to view sex largely in terms of recreation, ignoring its procreative orientation, they have lost touch with the grave violations that occur both in contraceptive sex and in making babies in test tubes.

Clearly, the moral violations that occur in IVF do not reflect upon the child, who is innocent. It is not the baby's fault in any way. The child has no control over how he or she got here. Regardless of how a baby comes into the world, whether by IVF, whether by adultery, by pre-marital sex, or even by cloning, that baby is always a gift and a blessing. The problem with IVF is not with the child, but with a decision made by the parents concerning how to pursue the satisfaction of their own desire for a child. In other words, babies, even when very much desired, should not be brought into the world by making use of disordered means such as adultery, pre-marital sex, IVF, or cloning. They should be brought into the world only within that intimate love-giving moment of the marital embrace.

Children are entitled to come into being as the fruit of a singular parental love that is uniquely manifested in the spousal moment of bodily surrender to each other. Through the incredibly rich language of the parents' bodies, through their body to body contact, the new body of their child is engendered. In their one-flesh union, they enflesh new life. That intimate bodily embrace is a sacred action that only spouses may share, and it represents the unique and privileged locus, by God's design, in which human love is translated into new life. IVF violates this design by replacing that love-giving act with an act of production, whereby we manufacture our own children in petri dishes and test tubes, as if they were products or objects to be manhandled at will.

In this way, IVF incidentalizes and adulterates sex, reducing it to another arena for manipulation according to our own desires. When we take this immoral step, others quickly follow, including the freezing or even the discarding of our own children, as if they were a form of medical waste. By making test tube babies, we first violate the sacred human act by which we hand on life. It is then but a short step to go further and violate the very life itself that we produce in the laboratory.

Is it not reasonable and right to insist, as the Church does, that new human life should be the fruit of married love, carried out through bodily self-giving between spouses, this act which allows each partner to enrich the other with the total gift of himself or herself? The marital act embodies spousal love directly, exclusively and authentically.

Can we say the same for IVF, where the woman upsets her delicate hormonal cycles and subjects herself to repetitive injections with powerful drugs to make her body produce unnaturally large numbers of eggs, and where the man may be expected to go into a back room with salacious magazines and videos to "provide a sample"? Can we really say that IVF embodies spousal love in an authentic and exclusive way when a lab technician ends up being the causal agent of the pregnancy, instead of the spouses themselves through a sacred act proper to their married love? By any stretch, can we honestly believe that IVF is faithful to God's design for marriage?

We sometimes tend to brush the ungainly and unsightly parts of the procedure under the rug and instead try to focus on the result, the baby, so as to mitigate the disturbing reality of what we are really engaging in. Some couples also may rest their approval for IVF on a perfunctory assumption, namely: "We have a right to a child when we get married, so any means, even IVF, should be okay." But the deeper truth is that we never have a right to a baby.

A child is not our property or our possession. Rather, a child is a gift, one we hope God will send us, one we stand ready and eager to receive, but certainly not an entitlement or a right for us. When we marry, we properly have a right to those beautiful, life-giving acts we call marital acts, which open us up to the mysterious divine spark at the heart of human love. Those remarkable marital acts are the only human acts appropriately ordered to engendering the incredible gift of new human life.

Rev. Tadeusz Pacholczyk, Ph.D. earned his doctorate in neuroscience from Yale and did post-doctoral work at Harvard. He is a priest of the diocese of Fall River, MA, and serves as the Director of Education at The National Catholic Bioethics Center in Philadelphia. See www.ncbcenter.org
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Hi Jimmy,

Thinking about you guys and it's just a thought. IVF is about $6,000 here in Panama as opposed to $25,000 in the States, however, they may be better at this procedure in the States. I know someone who just went through it. She is 42 (quite a bit overweight, but very pretty still) and I'm not sure the circumstances in their case, but after 3 tries they were not successful.

One time it took, but she miscarried. It was really sad, especially for her husband. She does have 2 almost-grown children, but her newish husband wants children of his own now that her children are about to leave the nest.

My heart goes out to you both. Not an easy decision or an easy trial for that matter, but I just have this feeling that God has a plan for your lives and it is a good one! Keep praying for God's guidance.

Keep the feedback coming at livinlowcarbman@charter.net and I'll be providing more updates, along with that special bead necklace and bracelet fundraiser, in the near future! THANK YOU again everyone!

An Enigmatic Quandary About Having An IVF/ICSI Baby

It's been a little more than a week since I've updated you on where my wife Christine and I are in our decision about what to do regarding having a baby. With terms like infertility, IVF, and donor sperm becoming a natural part of our lexicon these days, the exceptional response that so many of you have offered us has been tremendous. THANK YOU to everyone who has offered your opinions and we appreciate the incredible feedback.

Here's what has happened since the last update:

I went back to the reproductive endocrinologist for another semen analysis to see if there was ANY WAY POSSIBLE to have a baby using my sperm. The prospects were grim according to the two previous test results which yielded 4% and 0% quality sperm respectively. So I wasn't holding out much hope.

But imagine my surprise when the doctor said they found 8% motility (sperm that moved) which statistically is not that much different from the 4% since we are talking about MILLIONS of sperm. They like to see 50% motility for sperm to naturally do their thing and make babies naturally. While statistically it is possible since there are a little less than a million sperm that are motile, the likelihood of that happening is about as good as getting struck by lightning.

And yet there is GOOD NEWS in this now--the numbers are at least high enough that I can have MY BABY with Christine! Well, maybe. It will depend on that process called in vitro fertilization (IVF) and another specialized procedure called intracytoplasmic sperm injection (ICSI) (where the good sperm is injected into the middle of the egg to see if an embryo can be created from a fertilized egg). Since my quality sperm is so severely low, this is the ONLY way outside of that very small chance that one of my swimmers will find a way to reach Christine's eggs. While physically possible, it is probably unlikely. So IVF/ICSI is basically our primary pathway for having a baby produced by both of us.

We've had all the tests done which include an infectious diseases panel, the Anti-Mullerian Hormone (AMH) test (important blood test for measuring the follicles in the ovaries to determine if a woman can make babies--high AMH levels indicate a condition known as polycystic ovarian sydrome, aka PCOS, something livin' la vida low-carb has been known to help with), general hormone testing for Christine, semen analysis for me, a sonohysterogram to see Christine's ovaries on an ultrasound, and probably a few other one I just don't remember at this point. Each of these tests have been adding up the costs into the thousands of dollars already.

Now we face an enigmatic quandary about having an IVF/ICSI baby and WE WANT YOUR HELP. You've been such an amazing resource for us so far and we are facing a fast-approaching deadline for our decision (coming no later than November 14th!). If you have been through an IVF and/or ICSI cycle, whether you were successful or not, and would be willing to have us call you to talk about it, then please e-mail me your name and phone number at livinlowcarbman@charter.net. We have some very difficult issues to work through that only someone who has gone through before could possibly understand (it's back to that "shared human experience" thing again!).

The major issue right now is money. I know, it shouldn't be a concern when you are talking about the process of having your baby, but I'm trying to separate myself emotionally from this right now. It's easy to see how people get sucked into this without really thinking it through first. I don't have anything against reproductive endocrinologists who do what they do, but it's easy to manipulate helpless couples into making choices they probably shouldn't make.

With that said, the fact is this IVF/ICSI procedure is going to be VERY expensive. Because this is a specialized procedure and involves some highly sophisticated technologies, just doing this alone costs $12,000-15,000. That doesn't count all the drugs they put you on, these tests we've been doing, and then all the pre-natal care leading up to the birth that is quite costly, too. It's a lot to think about.

Worst of all, the money is due in full BEFORE they will even begin the process. I understand the reasoning for doing that because they want to make sure they get paid since there's no turning back once that wheel starts rolling since you can't take the baby away once it starts growing inside the mother. The doctor has to take care of his own best interests and that is completely understandable.

Our particular reproductive endocrinologist has something called an IVF Refund plan that we are considering as a possible option. You receive 3 IVF cycles and 3 Frozen Embryo Tranfers (FET) to try to get pregnant. They push this one hard to couples who are desperate for a child, but have been unable to do so yet. It is supposed to give you "peace of mind" about the decision, but I'm not convinced yet of that personally (so much for the "peace of mind" part).

Supposedly it gives you a 90% refund if you are not "pregnant" after those three attempts which is an incredible marketing tool for them. You know they HOPE you get pregnant on the first try so they can get more money out of you. I hate feeling this way, but I'm just naturally skeptical about these kind of things. The cost of the "guarantee" is more than double what one cycle would be--in excess of $25,000. So, basically, you pay for two IVF cycles and get one free if the first two don't work.

Then, my concern about this "guarantee" is in their definition of "pregnant?" It is quite possible that Christine could be pregnant by their legal standards, but then never have the baby itself. I asked our doctor about the number of successful IVF cycles that resulted in a baby at his office over the past year (the only REAL measure of success in my eyes) and he said it's about 50%. Our prospect for having a baby with this method is about as good as it is not. Is it worth taking out the equivalent of a luxury car payment loan to MAYBE have our baby?

The worst case scenario with doing this in my mind is getting stuck with a $600-700 monthly payment for the next five years for...nothing. No baby. No return on that investment. Nothing but heartache and more pain. And the vision of some doctor getting rich off the hopes and dreams of a couple who just wants to have a child of their own to hold, love, and cherish. The guy's probably a good man, but you can't help but think these kind of things.

By the way, why is this process so freakin' expensive anyway? What do all those thousands of dollars go towards paying? Where do people with modest to lower incomes go when they want to have a child, too? The answer is they don't have that opportunity. And our doctor's office says most health insurance companies won't pay a dime for it either! Sheez! This royally sucks!

On the other hand, the best case scenario is we have a beautiful baby (or multiple babies!) of our own and gladly pay that monthly payment for a child we can love and raise (we even started looking at names over the weekend). Christine and I have talked about the "cheaper" options like donor sperm and she is dead set against it since it is physically possible for us to have OUR baby.

So the only real decision we have on the table right now is this: Do we take the chance that we will have a baby using this method with the risk that we may not and be stuck with a monthly reminder into our 40's that we couldn't have a baby?

Again, it is very difficult for me to remove myself from this emotionally which I have tried to do as much as possible. But we earnestly want to hear from anyone who has been through this decision-making process to give us your wisdom and knowledge before we make our decision. Ultimately we will do what is right for us, but I trust and appreciate anyone who wishes to help us. Send us your phone number if we can speak with you sometime this week. This decision needs to happen no later than Friday, so time is of the essence.

Here are some more e-mails I received from my readers about our situation:

Jimmy,

I just read your blog post about the problems you and Christine are having with conceiving. I truly, in my heart, believe that there is a reason for everything we encounter in life. I am not good at putting into words how I feel about something but, here goes.

When I was 13 days old, my life began. I had been put up for adoption by my biological parents and that is the day my "real" parents took me home. Both of my sisters and I were adopted from the same place, The Edna Gladney Home in Ft. Worth, Texas. I believe today it is just called Gladney.

Had God not known what good, loving people my parents were, he would not have lead them down that path. It takes special people to take a child into their home that is not their biological child, and love that child as if they were their own. Many, many children living with their biological parents today do not experience that kind of unconditional love and sadly never will.

I know who my biological parents are. I know where they live, I know their phone numbers. I have not and will not make the call to either one of them. I am one of the seemingly few adoptees in today's society that honestly isn't even curious about them. God gave me the parents I had. The best parents that ever walked the face of the earth. The most loving, caring, attentive, willing to do what ever it took to give us a good life, people He could find for us. How special is that!? Even now, 16 years after the death of my father and 1 year after the death of my mother, I have no intention of making those phone calls.

I don't know you and Christine personally, but from what I have seen and read in the short time I have been introduced to the work you have done, you and Christine are cut from the same cloth as my parents. Your love of life, Christian beliefs and obvious love for each other flows outward from each and every post, pod cast, blog post and video you make.

If you cannot have children of your own, please don't forget that possibly God has other plans for you and Christine. There may be a child somewhere that desperately needs you to love them, care for them, teach them, grow with them and just be there for them. A child whose biological parents can not or will not. A child like I was.

God Bless you and be with you during this difficult time.
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I was adopted at birth and want to make a good case for adoption. I was adopted by people who wanted me very badly and they gave me the best life they could. Though I found my natural family when I was 29 and I became close to my natural mother and brother and sister (my father could never bring himself to meet with me), my adoptive parents will always be mom and dad to me.

Jimmy, knowing you to the extent that I do, I'm sure you would love an adopted child as your own blood. So you may consider adoption as one alternative. The difficulty is that adoption isn't as easy as it was in 1949, and you may have to accept a child that doesn't come from the same socioeconomic background as you and Christine, or a child of a different race, indeed from a foreign country.

I think it is very wise, Jimmy, not to rush into anything, and particularly not out of any sense of desperation. Try to keep in mind and heart, as I try to and don't always succeed, that you and Christine are each complete, as you are, with or without children.

A little more on the matter of being adopted: I didn't mention that being an adopted child, as loved as I was, was not without its odd feelings of insecurity and curiosity from time to time. But kids have such feelings for any number of reasons. I was not athletic, whereas my adopted father was, for example.

Incidentally, I later found out that my natural parents were too young to keep me, had conceived me out of wedlock, but I believe that they wanted me, but my father's parents who insisted that I be given up. How ironic since after I was born and given up, they pushed my father and mother into getting married, whence I have a full blood sister and brother from that union. It was absolutely stunning to meet them when I was 29.
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Many of my ‘infertile’ clients have conceived using the protocol listed below:

1) coenzyme Q10, which protects against reactive oxygen species in the spermatic membranes, significantly increases motility in infertile men, improves fertilization rates, and increases sperm count and motility; 600mg per day in divided doses

2) Arginine, a precursor of several compounds thought to play a role in sperm motility 3000mg (3 grams) per day in divided doses on an empty stomach

High dietary levels of arginine and/or ornithine may cause reactivation of latent herpes viruses in a few susceptible individuals. If this occurs, discontinue use. Herpes Viruses are also ‘cold sores’ that occur in and your mouth. So if you get these often, arginine is not recommended.

3) Carnitine, which plays several roles in the development of healthy spermatozoa and has been shown to increase sperm count and motility. 1500 mg (1.5 grams)per day in divided doses on an empty stomach

All of these will greatly increase sperm mobility and count.
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Hi, Jimmy--

I have read your online book and am a low-carber. I am also an IVF nurse. After reading thru your blog I felt like I needed to respond.

First, let me say that I know how difficult the journey is, I live it with people everyday. Second, please know that there is a huge variation of advise and techniques available depending on what clinic you go to. Our clinic, for instance has a national/internaitonal reputation and we see patients from around the country and the world. Many have been treated elsewhere unsuccessfully before they reach us.

This is really not a sales pitch for my clinic. But as another writer observed, most men only need a relative few sperm of their own to be able to father a child using the latest techniques of recovery and fertilization but not all labs have the tools or the personnel.

I am not anti-adoption by any means, and it is a good choice for some people. But it is difficult choice to give up your own biology. Maybe you're not quite at the point where you have to give that up.
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Dear Jimmy,

I recently discovered your blog from the writings of Dana Carpender. I am a long term low carber, been at it since 2002. I remember well the hoopla there was when Gary Taubes first wrote 'What's if it's all been a big fat lie'?; I remember waiting at my computer hoping that Dr. Atkins would recover from his ultimately fatal fall and I remember the low carb marketing mania of 2004. However unbelievably I just discovered you :)! I love your writing style and am in the process of trying to get through all your backdated blogs.

I was saddened to read about you and your wife's battle with infertility. I have PCOS and endometriosis so know what it's like to battle with an unwilling body. I am not currently trying to conceive but I chart my cycles. From this I can see that conceiving may not be the easiest for me.

As well as being a low carb diet fan I am also a big fan of alternative remedies and have found them to be very helpful for my own ailments. I found this website that features a doctor who is well known in the U.K. and Ireland and has had great success getting people pregnant by giving them megadoses of vitamins and overhauling their diet. She's more of a moderate carb, low saturated fat type but I do agree with her policies re: soy, caffeine, alcohol, organics and omega 3's.

Anyway I hope that things look up for you guys. I am from Ireland by the way and adore your Southern accent. It's my favourite accent in the world!

Keep the comments coming and God bless you guys for your loving support. We appreciate you more than we could ever tell you. :)